Without giving spoilers the premise of the movie is DO LESS as a Mum to ease the burden on yourself, and in the process raise amazingly responsible and independent human beings who are loved beyond measure. And isn’t that the goal of a great parent – growing responsible, independent and kind humans.
I don’t like the title of this movie. Sadly, there ARE bad mums in the world and in Australia they are the Mums (and Dads) who make up the cause of the 320,000 notifications of child abuse in Australia each year! These are the parents who do not do right by their kids. The rest of us are just day by day, hour by hour doing our best, winging it, hitting goals more than we strike out (which we do a fair bit of too).
I would hate to see the movie breed the notion of real mums as bad mums!
- Physically harm their children
- Deprive their children of love and affection
- Put others before their kids, usually a new boyfriend or girlfriend
- Starve their children or feed them crap (no nutrition therefore little brain and body growth)
- Leave them in the care of other unfit humans or leave them unattended at young ages
- Allow people into their children’s lives who abuse them – physically, emotionally and sexually
- Scream obscenities at them
- Allow their kids to get away with disrespectful things and then blame the authorities
- Don’t encourage, set expectations or mentor their children in anything positive
- You get the picture.
- Protect their kids but teach them to stand up for themselves (resilience training)
- Provide for their kids (But have them do their bit too)
- Support their kids (and expect support in return)
- Feed their kids nutritional meals (and occasionally cereal for dinner, maccas and pizza!)
- Give their kids consequences for crappy behaviour or actions
- Set boundaries and expectations and teach a work ethic
- Give their kids chores and age appropriate responsibilities to foster independence
- Lose their shit and need time out … occasionally
- Have support squads they can reach out to for those times
- Swear! Often under their breath…. occasionally (or more often depending on the hormone level of those in the house that week!)
- Invest in their kids education and extra-curricular activities
- May or may not volunteer at school, may or may not work outside the home
- Are not perfect, don’t pretend to be, nor are our kids but their kids are loved
Let’s not idolise bad Mums. Bad Mums need guidance and mentoring but rarely accept it or acknowledge the need. Bad Mums make up a great percentage of the 320,000 notifications of child abusers in Australia each year.
Real Mums on the other hand are just that, real mums doing the best they can for their kids, losing their shit occasionally and raising healthy, relatively well adjusted responsible and independent kind humans while enjoying girl’s nights out, time out, wine on occasion and a sleep in every so often.
I won’t spoil it for those who haven’t seen the movie but one of my favourite scenes is between Amy and her son, around who makes breakfast and why. Just perfect.
Highly recommend the movie. Here’s to all the Amy’s out there – doing our best, scoring more goals than we do misses, but when we do strike out sucking it up, venting to our support squad and moving on because our kids are loved, supported, protected and provided for and are genuinely good people (even with us as their mums!).
You are doing a great job, keep that up xo Next week’s article will be on HOW to do less as a parent and have a happier home :)
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